Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Conforming, Doing What's Expected To Fit In

Ever notice how people expect you to conform to the norms of society? If you have children your expected to do this and that, if your married or in a relationship your expected to act this way and not that way. I am not sure if the pressure to conform is placed on you by the people who have followed those unwritten rules because they do not like your independence and are envious or jealous of your perceived freedom (is anyone real free?) or because people have trouble thinking in new ways outside the box.

The people putting the pressure on others to act the same way as they do might have a point, they might be on the right path. If everyone did whatever they wanted to (within the laws of society) then the greater good our society might fall apart, everything might cease to function or at least function at a lower level. One thing I do know is that if you study the lives of great artists, independent thinkers and ground breaker type folks, they most often do not follow the norm, they do not fall to the pressure of their peers, they usually choose a unique path of their own design.

A nurse gave my father some great advice a few days back, my father told her he would refuse chemotherapy because it would not really help him and it would cause unnecessary pain, she said "It's your body and your choice, do what you think is right." We cannot allow peer pressure to conform and act a certain way to influence us, we all need to make our own judgements based on our own beliefs, it's our body, or lives, the person we need to make happy first is ourselves. That sounds very selfish and maybe it is but being happy in our own skins allows us to be a better person to all of those around us as well, happiness breeds more happiness. If you conform to fit in, if you follow the rules not because you agree with them but instead because your expected to, then that will ultimately eat you up and destroy something important. When your unhappy, when you lose that special spark that makes you who you are it's like a virus that destroys not only you but also everything around you. So by being selfish sometimes and finding your own personal happiness I believe your also benefiting those you love, your becoming a better person, a better lover, a better father, a better friend and a better husband.